boundaries gone mad

After resounding success with my crazy rules and boundaries plan, I have decided to extend this to all areas where the children are in need of 'guidance'

One example of this is whilst driving the car. OMG I have nearly had 2 accidents in the last week because I have been distracted by whinging (thank you Miss 2). And it is whinging... 'I've taken my shoe off and I want it back on' 'I've dropped my cup and I need it' 'I want my window up, window down, window up, window down' 'take my socks off...'

I am aware that I have some major flaws and unfortunately, one of those is a real lack of patience. I also like to fix problems and avoid conflict which are generally positive attributes but it would not seem so when dealing with a 2 or 3 year old. It seems as though 2 and 3 year olds have lots of problems and when they are not resolved NOW it may only take seconds to lead to conflict. Which leads me to my issues in the car...

If Miss 2 drops her cup (and i might add that this is a particularly demanding Miss 2) she will let me know. I will explain that i am driving and i can't reach it for her. She begins to whinge... and whinge... and whinge. Pressure rising, I tell her again that we are driving and i can't reach it. Whinge.... whinge... whinge.... Blood starting to boil I warn her to stop whinging. whinge... whinge... whinge... At this stage, the fixer in me wants nothing more than to put an end to this and for us all go back to calm and normal behaviour. There have been times when instinctively and without thinking, I have tried to find the cup for her. Driving with 2 children in the car with one hand reaching behind a seat is really not a good idea and has nearly caused more than one accident. The other downside to this is that no one has learnt anything and the next time we're in the car it all starts again.

So... what would my sane self do?? Make a list of rules and boundaries and keep them in the sun visor of my car. Obviously I will not be reading them whilst driving but there is something strangely comforting about knowing that these rules are at arms length for when I may need them. (and reading that last sentence, I'm starting to wonder just how sane my sane self is... but no time for self doubt now - I have rules to make!!)

What is annoying me? whinging. Well mainly whinging but there have been a few other things such as the children arguing and demanding that we take a detour to see a water fountain in the front garden of a house a few streets away. (I actually don't mind the detour, however I did have to introduce myself to the owners in case they thought I was casing the joint... ) So we'll concentrate on whinging and arguing.

What are my obligations? Most of the trips we take are less than 10 minutes so the following rules will be completely feasible.

• outline that whinging can be dangerously distracting to Mummy whilst driving and that we'll work it out when we get to our destination
• where possible, pull over and explain that we are waiting for them to stop whinging/arguing 
• If we cannot pull over, try distraction
• If we cannot pull over or distract, ignore and focus on driving
• NEVER, EVER, EVER encourage her by giving her what she wants before we arrive

Why does it sound so obvious when I write it out? Why does it nearly take an accident before I put my foot down and instill such strict rules? Why can't I just have more patience????

Maybe I could work on my flaws but until then, these are the new car rules... off to the printer I go!!